Out of Shape

I love George Carlin’s statement, “I’m in shape.  Round is a shape!”  I even have it on my myspace as my personal statement.  That’s been my mantra since I’ve gained so much weight with all these surgeries over the last couple of years.  Well, I’m going to have to fix that since I found out just how out of shape I really am over the weekend.

The girls and I love to take walks.  Lauren and I were both on the same wave length Sunday and decided to take a long walk.  We usually go in the evening but we noticed some ominous clouds on the horizon so we went right then.  We did one lap around the neighborhood and decided to take in at least one more since the clouds were barely coming up over our house.  We weren’t halfway around the circle that we do when it started to sprinkle. 

We weren’t too concerned because it can sprinkle for hours where we live.  Well, not this time.  Right about the time our house just became visible it started to hail.  Hard!  Lauren took off her shoes because they have poor traction and we ran.  I learned that I am no Jane Fonda.  I don’t want to feel the burn.  I made it to the first cul-de-sac and had to stop.  I wanted to die.  I walked a few steps and ran to the second cul-de-sac and decided death by hail was not so bad. 

Lauren was trying to stay upbeat as her socks were socked, she was soaked and was being pummelled by hail.  I told her she could run home.  I was fine.  But she wouldn’t leave me.  She kept trying to get me to keep running but I knew there was no way in Hades that I could finish it out. 

Kevin was watching us from the safety of the living room.  He met us at the kitchen door just laughing.  Lauren and I was soaked.  I wanted to die. 

“Don’t you feel exhilarated, though?” Lauren asked me.

“No honey.  I just want to feel Death.”

It’s been two days and my thighs are still sore.  I’ve stretched them out every morning and evening since my run.  I’m ready to do more damage though.  I told her if the weather was semi-decent tonight we would try to do two laps tonight with running from the top of the street to our cul-de-sac.  Because by the end of the month I will be able to run that section without wanting to curl in a ball in a corner.