I have been considering a comeback to blogging for some time. I even started one here and there only to delete it. What I was asking of myself was too great. I had wanted to feel the fun and freedom of blogging like I had in the mid 2000′s. I wanted this blog and this writing. But the wife and mother on this blog has changed drastically since my last post in 2009. But “Fragile What!?” kept whispering in my ear that I could come back to this blog and continue on even with a 3.5 year gap. So, here I am trying to figure out the best way to bridge that gap. I’m thinking a timeline. It should help right!? Ok, here goes:
September 2009: My now ex-husband, Kevin, started being a real jerk about me blogging. He told me that his family reads the blog and he attempted to tell me what I could or could not say. For those who know me, never tell me what to do or what I can’t do. I will be defiant and do the exact opposite of what you say. So I quit blogging. That was tough!!
November 2009: My father-in-law passed away. It was heart wrenching to Kevin to see his dad slip off this earth. He had a very tough time with it. I am use to loss. He wasn’t. The next 7 months changed our marriage for the worst. I tried to comfort him but apparently I was not what he wanted. Angie comforted better.
May 2010: The D word is finally uttered. I wanted to do counseling first. I am no quitter. We went to one session. I could tell he really wanted to counselor to say that our marriage had no hope. Instead, the counselor said that one issue could be that I had no where to just escape. He suggested that we turn our bedroom into a safe getaway for me. Kevin didn’t like that. The counselor also explained how survivors of abuse has this deep pit inside them that when activated erupts into this whole different being. He wanted Kevin to start thinking about how child abuse fuels my behaviors. Kevin was not impressed with that either. I wasn’t given anything to think about or work on. I wasn’t too happy with that. I went in with the mindset that my issue was with helping Kevin deal with his grief After just that one session he decided that couples counseling was useless. We never went back. Not going to lie…I think my marriage could have been saved if he wanted it to be saved.
June 2010: I move out. Lauren turns 18. Divorce is filed and finalized. Angie moves in. I can’t say if Kevin and Angie had an affair. I saw some Facebook conversations between them that gave me red flags. I have no proof but Kevin sure didn’t take to long to replace me. (and yes they are still together)
August 2010: I am diagnosed with Complex PTSD.
October 2010: My best friend, Steve, and I are chatting and jokingly say that we should try dating. Our exes were jealous of our friendship. Maybe they were seeing something we didn’t see. So Steve and I begin a long distance relationship. 2, 161 miles to be exact.
March 2011: Rachel and I fly to meet Steve and his daughters. Well, I had met Steve but Rachel hadn’t met any of them before. I come home and do the craziest thing I would have never imagined myself doing. I put in a 2 month notice at work and start planning a move to be closer to Steve.
June 2011: I move to the NE part of the USA. Steve flew down to drive Matthew and I to our new home. Best trip ever!! Rachel stayed back to spend the summer with her dad. She joined us in August 2011. Longest two months EVER!
May 2012: Steve proposes!!
December 2012: Steve and I elope. <3 My family grows by 3. Steve and his two daughters, Heather and Alissa .
February 2013: I am admitted into the hospital for four days with some intestinal issue. As of today, we are still testing and trying to figure out what is going on.
I think that pretty well catches us up. I hope. So here I blog again. Hopefully, consistently. 
To add insult to injury Lauren was there to spend the weekend. Without going into all of it, we are disappointed in Lauren and how selfish she acted during this volatile time. She turned the situation into being all about her. Kevin went to get her from her grandparents and she was acting so immature she wouldn’t even sit in the front seat by Kevin. This is a time when families need to be consoling each other, not acting like spoiled brats. When they got home Kevin tried to console her, thinking this was the issue, and she just kept up her antics. He gave up and decided to get changed and get to the hospital.
As for my FIL, he is in ICU this morning. My mother-in-law cried the whole time he was getting admitted. They are so young, 68 & 67. They have been together almost 50 years. The hospital want the do-not-resuscitate orders this morning, which is never a good sign. Kevin came home around 2ish. He talked, I cried. He has so much love and respect for his mom and dad and this is breaking his heart. He left our van with his mom so she can get around a bit better than with her car. He brought her 
car home so he could get some rest. Here shortly I plan to wake him up so he can get cleaned up and head back up there. That way his mom can run whatever errands she needs to, like getting the DNR order, and get herself clothing and toiletries.
